Mother Mary – Lessons About Love

Q. I know that we often learn some of our greatest lessons through all of the challenges that we face, but why does it have to be this way? Why can’t we just have easy, peaceful lives without all of the pain and suffering?

A. There are so many lessons that you choose to learn while you are in human form and many of them can only be learned through contrast as that is how humans learn best, through understanding first what something is not and then learning what it is.

Think about how you learned about temperature. You learned about hot by experiencing hot. You learned about cold by experiencing cold. You learned that one temperature is really the absence of the other. You learned all of this through contrast. If you did not first know what hot was, you would not understand cold. You need to have something to compare it to for it to make sense to you.

You live in a world of duality at this time and this is how you learn the easiest based on how human brains work at this time. This is changing, but this is the situation for now.

You decided what your life lesson was going to be before you came into physical form. This is the case for all of you. Your reason for coming into human form is to learn what it is like to be human and you come into each incarnation with a plan for what you will learn.

If your main lesson while you are here is to learn about love, you are going to encounter situations that will teach you both what love is and what love is not, for it is not possible in a world of duality to know what something is, like hot, with out knowing what something is not, like cold.

So, if your main life lesson is love, you will most likely decide to get the more difficult part of this lesson out of the way first and be born into a life situation where you first learn what love is not – to learn the absence of love. You may be born into a family that is abusive or neglectful or just does not know how to express love to their children.

You will spend many years exploring all of the aspects of what love is not. And along the way as you journey through life, you begin to learn lessons of what love is by getting connected to people who can teach you what it is like to really feel loved, to learn in wholeness what love is.

You can judge this to be learning through situations that are bad or challenging and by learning through situations that are good and enjoyable, but what you have chosen to learn is the entire range of what love is and what love is not. This is the complete lesson about love.

What you will soon be able to do and what some of the new children who are coming in are able to do is to just be in a place of neutral, of complete acceptance of all that is, the oneness of the duality as you perceive it to be. You will let go of the judgment that you place on the experiences where they will no longer been seen as good or bad, but just as what it.

The only reason you experience the absence of love as bad or painful is because you judge the absence of love to be that way. The feelings that the absence of love generates in your body do not feel good to you and it is given the label bad. You are not actually labeling the experience as bad, but labeling the feeling that results from the situation as bad, for it is the feeling that you don’t like, not so much the experience itself.

For example, someone that you have felt love for decides to leave you and does not really explain why. Automatically, you may feel hurt, you feel a loss, you feel bad as you define it. It is not the actual situation of the person leaving that is the problem for you, but how you choose to feel about the situation. This loss is seen as a bad thing.

Now think about he same situation, but add in the fact that the person who you loved also had some habits that you really did not enjoy, like drinking too much, or being rude to other people, or even is controlling of what you do. Then, the fact that this person decides to leave and does not explain why may leave you feeling relieved, glad and even happy that they are no longer in your life. The same situation, but you have chosen to feel differently about the situation. This loss then becomes a good thing.

How you feel about every situation is dependent on how you process the information about the situation in your mind. This then results in feelings that you either call good or feelings that you call bad. It is not the situation that results in your emotional reaction, but your perception of the situation and the meaning that you give to it.

You will all have challenging situations throughout your lives. How you feel about them is truly up to you. If you can begin to see the situation itself as something neutral and accept that is you and how you  process the situation in your mind which generates the feelings, you will realize that whatever happens in your life is neither good nor bad, it just is.

And remember too that there is a reason for each and every experience in your life. Everything that you encounter is the result of a decision that you made at some level, either to teach you something that you wanted to learn, or just for the pure adventure of having the experience.

It’s time to take ownership of your own life and be aware that everything that happens has a purpose, although you may or may not be aware of what that purpose is. And if you choose to, you can see each and every experience as just another learning experience to bring you closer to understanding the truth of who you are and what you came here in human form to learn.

When you look at your life in this way, your experience of how you feel shifts, for the situations are no longer good or bad, they are just part of the experience that you have chosen to experience to grow and to experience life in the fullest, to know both what something is and what is its not.

Blessings on your journey of discovery,

Mary, your divine mother.


9 Responses to Mother Mary – Lessons About Love

  1. Núria says:

    Thank you, Jillian, for your reply. Reading it gave me a sort of warm feeling !!


  2. Núria says:

    Hi, J.

    Well, I also thought for some of my worst years that Death was my only door open. I even tried in several ways but I failed. I will spare you all this story of wanting, searching everywhere… and when I say everywhere I mean everywhere, the good and the ” bad ” places, with this and that attitude, through this and that door, alcohol, drugs, prostitution,… and now what I have from all that searching is the strong will to get there, to get what I want. Women are more powerful than society will permit you to know. But, our power is different. I am discovering my own, and at the same time I have to deal with my everyday problems, and with a husband who doesn’t follow me. And above every single gesture of mine, every single word I utter, every single thought, there is a Light I aknowledge.
    Please, let us know how you are feeling today.Write some words. Thank you.

    • J says:

      Hi Nuria,
      I just saw this now r i would have replied sooner. Thank you for caring 🙂
      I am okay mothers Day was hard–I have lost everything of past and I just miss my family the most–yet i know there is a reason. I still wish to “go home” but the other day wishing this a crow flew over my head with a strange Caw: UH UH — UH UH lol 🙂 it was funny sounding. this “passage” is rough and now i have physical pains it all seems to never end yet i know it is leading to a better world here–I cant wait to meet others in physical and off the internet!

  3. Gwendolyn says:

    Bless your heart, J. You are looking out side of yourself for love. Love is an inside job. Love yourself and be enough for yourself. then you are not dependent on others for love and you are free. all the love that you need is within. Find your I AM presence within and you will find everything else that you need, money, companionship,etc.

  4. Núria says:

    Thank you for your words and dedication. My let’s call it ” problem ” is a bit different. I married a man 8 years ago being more or less conscious that I was not in love with him but at the time I needed someone who could help me with my addictions, which I recovered from. After a few difficult months of living together I conquered back some of my health and decided to have a baby. A year later we married. And now, as I look back, I see myself as a person who identified mostly with matter, so I wanted things, objects, trips, going to restaurants, which my husband provided. But my spiritual side never stopped to grow and now I look at my husband with compasion because he never understood my search for light but I also wonder if I will ever be with another man, who understands me in a deeper level. I don’t want to hurt my husband but I feel so appart from him. Can you shed some of your light on this ? Thank you again and, please,excuse my mistakes in writing English for it is not my mother tongue.

    • J says:

      Nuria I went through very similar but divorced–too long a story but i was caught in the same “looking for outer stuff” we always went out to eat–that was “our thing”
      just listen to your heart and look at him for all his good and focus on that and take care of yourself. Experience is the best teacher and I have learned NOW i would do it all with my heart and not my mind next time…

  5. sheryl says:

    I have also been in that place of pain where you feel so alone, like no one cares and you’d rather not bee here at all. That is a dark space that I visit often, but have found ways to make this happen less often.

    I’ve learned to call on my guides and angels for help and support and then watch for the signs of help and take action when needed.

    There is so much love and support around you just waiting for you to ask for help.

    Blessings, sheryl

  6. J says:

    Yes, but this for me is going on years, nothing left of those i love, nor work now, no possessions, mostly i miss my loved ones and cant get over it. I had to choose the stret or an alcholic who is verbally abusive, again I have grown from that aswell. But i am tired of growing I want to live life and share it but it is just me again and again–I tried to get work and that wont “work” either. Now no food no money no love, why am I here? I want to leave, calmly i say that for there is nothing here for me. I believed it would change but it worsens, the ones who have died to me are so lucky. Death is nothing compared the the last few years—I beg for it mostly now. I know my heart and I love, but I love alone in a world that does not see me, and i cannot much longer without change…

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