I’m starting to feel like I have some energy back again since yesterday. I even got some housework done. Not a lot, mind you, but at least got the rest of the Christmas decorations packed for storage. Since it’s almost June, I thought it was about time.
Yes, I am really behind in housework. It just has not been a priority this past year. I’ve learned to ignore the clutter and have made friends with the many dust bunnies who hide under the furniture. I’ve started to care about my home again and long for a well organized living space to work in. I know it’s coming once I have some energy back again.
I’ve been working with a herbalist in California, Keith Smith for the past 6 months. I was taking a phone seminar with Steve Rother (who channels the Group) and he started talking about this guy who treated his son for depression with amazing results.
Keith believes that most people with chronic health problems have “reversed polarity”, that our body’s electrical system gets reversed which weakens our body and opens it up to developing disease.
I spent an hour on the phone with him being asked questions and he diagnosed this as the root of my depression and that it was possible to bring my body’s polarity back into the normal state and then my body could heal. He gave me a combination of herbal products to take which arrived by mail a few days later.
I must admit to having been a total skeptic when it comes to anything that does not fit into the paradigm of modern medicine. For 23 years, I have been doing what doctors have advised me to do and I was coping, but never really felt well.
After my burnout experience just over a year ago, my doctor just advised rest and no stress to see if my body would relax back into a state of health. There were no more medical options to try outside of an experimental treatment for depression where they implant some kind of electric brain stimulator. I was not quite ready to be a lab rat, but was at the point where I would try almost anything.
With no other options available, I decided to look into alternatives. I read somewhere that when there are no other options available, you turn to God, which is what I did. I decided to tune into my own inner guidance, to connect to my guides and beings in spirit and ask for help. That is what led me to Keith and his herbal magic.
I must say that I still have some hesitation about whether or not this will help to heal over 20 years of chronic depression, but I am so willing to hope and give it a try. I have notices some very positive differences, but still struggle with fatigue which has been a constant companion for far too many years. I’m so tired of being tired.
I check in with Keith every 5 weeks or so and he can monitor my progress by tuning into my energy and measuring my levels. They have been increasing with each check in which he says is exactly what is supposed to happen, but I still can’t say I feel well yet. I’m still waiting for the magic to really happen.
Keith keeps reminding me to be patient and when I put this into perspective, waiting up to a year to feel well after 23 years of misery is really not a lot of time. I am learning about patience which is not my strong point.
Part of the fatigue issue is related to the many years of stress that a chronic illness has had on my body. Keith and I talked about my adrenals being “fried”, that is, so overworked in response to stress that this system has basically shut down. It is now time in this herbal treatment to add herbs to correct this as well as my thyroid which is also not functioning properly. I’ve been told that these herbs will start to do the magic of bringing my energy back. That, I really look forward to.
I’ve been really hard on myself lately with all of the “should be doing….” that goes on in my mind. What I would like to do and what my body will allow me to do just don’t match up right now, but I have faith that being guided to work with a herbalist will make a difference.
Along with the herbs, I have been doing most of the things my guides have suggested, like read certain books, work with certain healers, and learn different healing and life changing techniques. It’s been quite an adventure. I’m so glad that I decided to turn to prayer and seek divine guidance. It’s making a real difference.
I am so looking forward to the day when I am well, when I can feel confident standing up and educating people about the gift that comes from seeking divine guidance and alternative solutions for medical issues. I know that this is part of the work I will be doing in the future.
Until then, I think I’ll just pour another cup of tea, sit in the sunshine and read a book, just “being” for another day.